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January 30, 2006

For the working folk.....

Got this from my old boss good friend, Ellen.

It's too good and too REAL to not share with you all.

BOSS

Got this from my old boss good friend, Ellen.

It's too good and too REAL to not share with you all.

BOSS

Posted by Teresa at 09:16 PM | Category:
| Comments (1)

January 29, 2006

It's finally arrived....

I finally got my multitask computer desk!!

I finally got my multitask computer desk!!

Posted by Teresa at 08:34 PM | Category:
| Comments (5)

January 25, 2006

The whole family is warped.....

I got this from my uncle, he is about 70, but still the coolest uncle EVER!!!
Some are old....Some are new!
Can you guess which ones "I" like? And there are also a few that made me think of some friends too!

SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE

What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One US leader.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts.

What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick..

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade.
Who has the biggest boobs?
The blonde, because she's 18

What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."

Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?

Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

What's the Cuban National Anthem?
"Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

I got this from my uncle, he is about 70, but still the coolest uncle EVER!!!
Some are old....Some are new!
Can you guess which ones "I" like? And there are also a few that made me think of some friends too!

SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE

What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
One US leader.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts.

What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick..

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade.
Who has the biggest boobs?
The blonde, because she's 18

What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."

Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?

Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

What's the Cuban National Anthem?
"Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

Posted by Teresa at 05:20 PM | Category:
| Comments (6)

January 24, 2006

No prudes allowed.....

Okay, so if you are a George "W" loving, easily offended, bible beating Republican,,,,,,just move on,,,,,read NO MORE!

Otherwise, its no secret the "lifestyle" I follow. I'm out to all. My family. My friends. My co-workers. I even have a rainbow of hearts tattooed on my one wrist.

So no secrets here.

Today I was talking to someone at work, a woman who was pissed off at her husband because he wouldnt kill a spider in their house this am. It scared him. Big baby!

Anyway, the conversation ends like this....

Okay, so if you are a George "W" loving, easily offended, bible beating Republican,,,,,,just move on,,,,,read NO MORE!

Otherwise, its no secret the "lifestyle" I follow. I'm out to all. My family. My friends. My co-workers. I even have a rainbow of hearts tattooed on my one wrist.

So no secrets here.

Today I was talking to someone at work, a woman who was pissed off at her husband because he wouldnt kill a spider in their house this am. It scared him. Big baby!

Anyway, the conversation ends like this....

"R"...."I swear to God men are such pussies"

"ME"..."Yup, that's why I just take out the whole middle man thing...and just stick right with the pussies!"

Yup there was the need to get some paper towels to clean up the coffee she spit RIGHT ACROSS THE ROOM when she heard that!

Posted by Teresa at 03:31 PM | Category:
| Comments (3)

January 23, 2006

Ummmmm

I went to my blog page today and its blank.....Guess that means I should make an entry of something important, huh?

Think.....
Think.....
THINK DAMN IT.....

OKAY,,,,How's this:
8 months from today, Mr. Bruce Springsteen will be 57 years old.

WOW! I almost hurt myself thinking of that entry!
Hope you are all well....

I went to my blog page today and its blank.....Guess that means I should make an entry of something important, huh?

Think.....
Think.....
THINK DAMN IT.....

OKAY,,,,How's this:
8 months from today, Mr. Bruce Springsteen will be 57 years old.

WOW! I almost hurt myself thinking of that entry!
Hope you are all well....

Posted by Teresa at 05:11 PM | Category:
| Comments (3)

January 11, 2006

Oh you silly silly people....

Don't you know a "sure" thing when its right in front of you?

Still wondering what Debby &Laura REALLY look like?

Why don't you ask ME for a photo or two?
As you know, or have read on a bathroom wall in the past I'M CHEAP & EASY! Please inquire about payment to my PAYPAL account for all request.

Don't you know a "sure" thing when its right in front of you?

Still wondering what Debby &Laura REALLY look like?

Why don't you ask ME for a photo or two?
As you know, or have read on a bathroom wall in the past I'M CHEAP & EASY! Please inquire about payment to my PAYPAL account for all request.

Posted by Teresa at 10:29 PM | Category:
| Comments (6)

January 09, 2006

You soooooo gotta love this!

Discarded Mouse Returns to Set Home Ablaze

FORT SUMNER, N.M. (Jan. 8) - A mouse got its revenge against a homeowner who tried to dispose of it in a pile of burning leaves. The blazing creature returned to the man's house and set it on fire.

Luciano Mares discarded a mouse in a pile of burning leaves, then it returned to set his house on fire.

Luciano Mares, 81, of Fort Sumner said he caught the mouse inside his house and wanted to get rid of it.

"I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house," Mares said from a motel room Saturday.

Village Fire Chief Juan Chavez said the burning mouse ran to just beneath a window of the nearby home. The flames spread up the window and throughout the house.

All contents of the home were destroyed, he said. No injuries were reported.

Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.

"I've seen numerous house fires," village Fire Department Capt. Jim Lyssy said, "but nothing as unique as this one."

Discarded Mouse Returns to Set Home Ablaze

FORT SUMNER, N.M. (Jan. 8) - A mouse got its revenge against a homeowner who tried to dispose of it in a pile of burning leaves. The blazing creature returned to the man's house and set it on fire.

Luciano Mares discarded a mouse in a pile of burning leaves, then it returned to set his house on fire.

Luciano Mares, 81, of Fort Sumner said he caught the mouse inside his house and wanted to get rid of it.

"I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house," Mares said from a motel room Saturday.

Village Fire Chief Juan Chavez said the burning mouse ran to just beneath a window of the nearby home. The flames spread up the window and throughout the house.

All contents of the home were destroyed, he said. No injuries were reported.

Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.

"I've seen numerous house fires," village Fire Department Capt. Jim Lyssy said, "but nothing as unique as this one."

Posted by Teresa at 06:56 PM | Category:
| Comments (6)

January 08, 2006

Friday the 13th......

Did y'all know that was coming up soon? Well this year it happens to be my brother's birthday....

Ever since 9/11 happened, my brother has been involved with the fire department in his town. It's all volunteer work. Sometimes its a bit much and causes problems with him/his wife/my parents and so on.

Anyway, I bought him this birthday card.....Get it?
BTW, the answer to previous entry is $247.52

You can click the picture to enlarge the view.

Did y'all know that was coming up soon? Well this year it happens to be my brother's birthday....

Ever since 9/11 happened, my brother has been involved with the fire department in his town. It's all volunteer work. Sometimes its a bit much and causes problems with him/his wife/my parents and so on.

Anyway, I bought him this birthday card.....Get it?
BTW, the answer to previous entry is $247.52

You can click the picture to enlarge the view.

Posted by Teresa at 01:54 PM | Category:
| Comments (2)

January 07, 2006

How much? Wanna guess?

I'm taking this to the coin counter today....

I'm taking this to the coin counter today....

Posted by Teresa at 10:56 AM | Category:
| Comments (7)